"THE ELEVATOR C" E22
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THIS WEEK: "ESTEEM" RECOGNITION part 1 of 2
For years now every body talks about self-esteem.
You read about it in articles, learn about it in seminars, hear about it in sports camps.
Have you ever read or heard a definition for self-esteem?
Has anyone in those articles, workshops or sports camps taken the time or paid attention enough to share a definition?
For something deemed so important don't you think that is a necessity?
Society traditionally thinks of self-esteem as accomplishment & ability.
The higher the grade, the better job, the best figure & clothes lend themselves to
levels of higher self-esteem.
The opposite also occurs.
The last person picked for a team, the unattractive person, the holder of a menial job
is seen by others and experiences lower self-esteem.
Let's back up.
When you walk into a room & see an infant
don't you smile & feel good just because it is there?
Is it because you know they'll be a math expert,
sports great or an important executive one day?
Of course not. At that point you have no idea what they will be.
You have only your hopes & dreams for them.
You love them & feel good in their presence just because they exist.
You create a refrigerator art gallery,
collect clay jewelry trays & wear their macaroni necklaces.
Prior to the age of 7 at home,
in preschool & kindergarten every effort is rewarded.
The child is valued. Not their effort, nor accomplishment nor ability.
Beginning around the age of 7, at the time students enter 2nd grade, the judging begins.
The child who tries his best & earns a C grade is held in & feels lower esteem
than one who earns an A.
The slower runner who doesn't make the team experiences the same lower esteem than the student with the ability to run fast.
It continues into adulthood.
The adult who loses her job through layoff beyond her control
& the man who has difficulty maintaining relationships - each experiences low esteem.
Before reading further, how do you define esteem? Have you defined it?
Remember the feelings we have for the infant.
Esteem must be based on things that you can control.
Your value is in your existance not how much or how well you do.
There is no need to work on your value.
So we arrive at my definition for esteem.
Esteem is Specialness Due to Existance.
It arrives with our 1st breath intact & complete.
Think about that this week.
I'll continue this discussion next week as we look at
the difference between self-esteem & self-confidence.
to provide training for your staff,